I didn’t end up in (or under) any of the Kansas floods. My house DIDN’T wash away. (knock on soggy wood) although I shouldn’t count that out yet.
Humor | Satire |Funny
What a beautiful Sunday morning. I was sitting on the porch today with Daisy, our Jack Russell mix, and Jaco our black lab/pointer mix. Without any notice at all Jaco bound from the top step…
Who actually decides how movies are rated? How do they know who should watch what and the type of effect it would have on them?
So recognizable is this statue that most people ignore its disproportional elements. The head is large for the body, as are the hands, but many people have commented on one aspect of this statue—David’s penis.
Have you ever had Vertigo? Vertigo slams into your head like a speeding bullet, a bus out of nowhere, and full of maliciousness in its pursuit of a wobbly gait.
“Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter”… This one I caught in the Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this.
Recently, I was having a conversation about passwords and online protection with son CJ. He told me a few interesting stories about passwords when he worked for the Registrar’s Office
A man walks into a restaurant with his pregnant wife. Hostess: “Table for two?” Man #1: “Yes please.” Hostess: “Would you like the conversational section or the silent section?” Man #1 looks at his wife. Wife #1 puts her finger to her lips. Man #1: “We’ll take the silent section.” Hostess: “Right this way please.” […]
“Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, “Never take candy from strangers.” And then they dressed me up and said, “Go beg for it.” I didn’t know what to do! I’d knock on people’s doors and go, “Trick or treat.” “No thank you.” Rita Rudner Halloween Humor: 10 Things To Do If You […]
At the gentle prodding of my husband, BJ, I finally emptied out the last of the boxes since our move in March. For six months I have
I grabbed my home security system, a Junior Louisville Slugger I’d picked up at a garage sale. At that moment it felt tiny as a drum stick.
My husband was helping me set up the Bluetooth in my car today. The quick reference guide was fairly easy to understand but
Hello Kitty 1st USA Convention… RIP Joan Rivers – Keep em Laughing in Heaven! I send my deepest condolences to family.
Like the multiple pirates inheriting the name Dread Roberts in The Princess Bride, Joaquin Murrieta shared his name with members of his gang,…
O Captain! My Captain! our fearful trip is done, The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won, The port is near, the bells I hear…
There is an abundance of guidance on the Internet, in bookstores, magazines, newspaper advice columns and talk radio about how to keep your marriage healthy. I’m not going to criticize the tips often touted by experts because they are important and I don’t want to disregard this valuable wisdom but there are things that no matter where you research get glossed over. First, let’s go over a
You are the baker of your ideas; you are the yeast and the sponge from which all elasticity rises. If you choose, you can stretch and fold or slap and punch your way though any obstacles.
I had a strange dream last night. I was working at a trade show. The convention center was filled with hundreds of people interacting with others in a very solemn way. Everyone was dressed in black as if attending a funeral. It was confusing to me that not one person smiled, as if the residing emotional committee had banned smiling. I was representing a company that had invented a new type of
As a California resident I am reminded of the importance of earthquake preparedness on a daily basis. I know we are overdue and I do have certain items in place in case of emergency but the biggest danger is that you don’t know where you will be when it hits. It would be nice to have ample warning so you could get yourself to an open field because it isn’t the earthquake that injures people it’s
The corner of Roy’s mouth tipped up in a crooked grin as he looked around at Harry’s latest pigsty. It was a Goldenwest singlewide. The natural wood grain was photographed veneer but glued nicely from floor to ceiling. Panel so thin it cracked from the sound of a loud fart. Harry’s chihuahua, Halapeeno, had done a keen job on the carpet. He liked to dig and since Harry didn’t
I received a gift in the mail yesterday from a friend who lives in another state. She said she was cleaning out one of her bookcases and found a book she knew I could use. I’m not sure if she is familiar with the area I moved to but I’m going to assume she thinks its particularly troublesome. I started thumbing through the chapters of this book titled, The COMPLETE Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook.
A technical writer is a professional writer who engages in technical writing and produces technical documentation for technical, business, and consumer audiences. According to Wikipedia, this defines the profession as preparing information that helps users who use a product. When, however, does the technical writer stop informing the user and begin to confuse them? Is there a limit to just how technical the […]
It was the flash of an eight-foot-wide chrome mud flapper on the back of an RV that sported the name, Country Coach that snapped me into the moment.
Have you ever wondered if comments that you made in passing or thoughts you posted online, were received in the manner you meant them? It seems that this week, I am both the receiver and the deliverer of ill-conceived comments. Thought Number One: You Might of Phrased that a Tad Better Several times this past […]
On the heels of receiving a rejection from a major agent who loved my query and synopsis (“very intriguing,” she wrote) but then didn’t get hooked after all, I’m in need of some levity today. The following tweet and picture from author Melissa Harrison in my Twitter feed helped. When I first learned to proofread, […]
I still have a buzz from Saturday night. I’m sluggish, headachy, nauseated, and have an overall feeling of unpleasantness. No, I didn’t drink. I went to see the Eagles in concert at The Forum. The Madison Square Garden Entertainment Company claims they spent $100 million dollars and I was looking forward to seeing this concert […]
I was watching a movie with my husband today when all of a sudden he paused it, looked to the left and to the right then nodded, “Motorcycle.” He resumed the movie. I asked him to pause it again. “What do you mean, motorcycle?” He thumbed over his shoulder and in the next moment a […]
During one of my lunch hours last week I called my doctor to schedule a routine, bi-annual blood test. It’s a very busy office, and just as I anticipated, the receptionist who answered my call asked if she could put me on hold. I sat at my desk and played with my shoe letting it […]
The Huffington Post recently published an article about how computers, games and phones are affecting kids’ bodies. They seem to be developing pain in their fingers and thumbs from playing games and texting. Sitting in front of a screen more than being outside can develop extra narrow blood vessels in their eyes. Too much time […]
This morning I read an article written by Oliver Burkeman for, The Guardian. It is an overview of daily routines of history’s most creative minds. I was fascinated by some of the examples he gave, such as Benjamin Franklin spending his mornings naked (an air bath) and that Agatha Christie didn’t own a desk. Every morning, […]